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Cognitive Distortions and Trauma: When Your Brain Lies to Protect You
<p>You’re Not Broken—You’re Wired for Survival If you’ve lived through trauma, you’ve probably found yourself wondering, “Why do I always think the worst?”, “Why can’t I believe good things about myself?”, or “Why do I blame myself for everything?” The answer often lies in something called cognitive distortions—automatic, distorted ways of thinking that helped you […]</p>

Joy Plote
Jun 17, 20254 min read


Why Written English Isn’t Enough: Language Equity for Deaf ASL Users
<p>By Joy Plote, LPC, CI/CT Imagine being handed a contract in your second language, one that you were never given full access to as a child. Imagine being expected to read it, understand it, and sign it—without ever being offered the chance to have it explained in your native language. For many Deaf individuals who […]</p>

Joy Plote
May 26, 20254 min read


Embracing Growth: Focusing on What You Gained, Not What You Lost
<p>In life, we all face adversity in one form or another—whether it’s a personal loss, a career setback, or a challenging relationship. During tough times, it’s easy to become fixated on what we’ve lost: a job, a loved one, a dream, or even our sense of self. But what if we chose to focus on […]</p>

Joy Plote
May 19, 20253 min read


When Exploding Feels Like the Only Way to Be Heard: Reactive Abuse and Deaf Experiences
<p>By Joy Plote, Coda Counselor | The Space Between Most people think abuse looks like yelling, hitting, or cruel words. But what happens when someone stays quiet for years… until one day, they finally explode? In the Deaf community, that explosion is often misunderstood. What if the person being labeled as “abusive” is actually reacting […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 26, 20253 min read
Taking the Wheel: Understanding Locus of Control in Healing and Growth
<p>What do you believe drives the course of your life? Is it your effort and decisions — or is it luck, fate, or what others do to you? This belief is called locus of control, and it has a powerful impact on how we heal, grow, and show up in the world. So, what is […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 26, 20252 min read
A Seat at the Table: Why Codas Must Speak Out on Deaf Education and Intergenerational Trauma
<p>Intergenerational trauma does not exist in isolation—it is deeply rooted in the choices, struggles, and dynamics passed down through families. For Codas (Children of Deaf Adults), the legacy of educational and linguistic decisions made by our hearing grandparents has profoundly shaped our lives. Yet, our experiences are often dismissed or undervalued in conversations about Deaf […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 15, 20253 min read
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): A Therapy for Trauma Healing
<p>Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is an evidence-based psychotherapy designed to help individuals process and heal from trauma, PTSD, anxiety, and distressing life experiences. Developed by Dr. Francine Shapiro in the late 1980s, EMDR helps people reprocess painful memories so they no longer cause intense emotional distress. Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR focuses on […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 13, 20254 min read
The Principles of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
<p>Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a structured, evidence-based approach designed to help individuals regulate emotions, improve relationships, develop distress tolerance, and practice mindfulness. Originally developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan for individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), DBT has since been widely used for trauma survivors, individuals with emotional dysregulation, and people struggling with impulsivity, self-harm, […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 10, 20254 min read
Cognitive Dissonance: Why We Struggle with Conflicting Thoughts
<p>Cognitive dissonance is a psychological phenomenon that occurs when a person holds two or more contradictory beliefs, values, or attitudes at the same time. This internal conflict creates mental discomfort, which can lead to feelings of anxiety, stress, or unease. To reduce this discomfort, people often attempt to justify, rationalize, or change their beliefs or […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 8, 20252 min read
Cognitive Distortions: What They Are and How They Affect Thinking
<p>Cognitive distortions are biased or irrational thought patterns that negatively influence how we perceive ourselves, others, and the world. They are often automatic and can reinforce negative emotions, anxiety, depression, and unhelpful behaviors. These distortions act as mental filters that twist reality, making situations seem worse than they are. Recognizing and challenging them is key […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 7, 20253 min read
The Power of Validation: How to Strengthen Relationships Through Emotional Understanding
<p>In any relationship—whether with a partner, child, friend, or colleague—one of the most powerful ways to foster trust and connection is through validation. Validation means recognizing and affirming another person’s emotional experience, helping them feel seen, heard, and understood. Unfortunately, many people were not taught how to validate emotions. Instead, the instinct is to fix, […]</p>

Joy Plote
Mar 6, 20254 min read
Brainspotting: Unlocking Trauma Through the Power of the Mind-Body Connection
<p>Brainspotting, a therapeutic approach developed by Dr. David Grand, is revolutionizing the way trauma, emotional pain, and psychological issues are processed. Rooted in neuroscience, Brainspotting focuses on identifying and working with “brainspots,” specific eye positions that correlate with unresolved trauma or emotional experiences. By targeting these brainspots, this therapy allows individuals to process and release […]</p>

Joy Plote
Feb 27, 20254 min read
Persistent Demand for Autonomy: The Other Side of Demand Avoidance
<p>Persistent Demand for Autonomy: The Other Side of Demand Avoidance When discussing Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) or general demand avoidance, the focus is often on resistance to demands. However, the other side of this equation—the persistent demand for autonomy—is just as important to understand. For individuals with PDA, autonomy isn’t just preferred—it is essential for […]</p>

Joy Plote
Feb 19, 20254 min read
Receptive Bilingualism: A Different Kind of Understanding
<p>Language is at the heart of identity, connection, and culture. For many in the Deaf community and Codas (Children of Deaf Adults), bilingualism is a natural part of life, often encompassing a signed language like American Sign Language (ASL) and a spoken or written language such as English. However, not all individuals who grow up […]</p>

Joy Plote
Jan 12, 20254 min read
Parentification: The Hidden Struggle for Codas
<p>In the ideal family dynamic, parents nurture and children thrive. However, for many Children of Deaf Adults (Codas), the family structure takes on a different shape. Codas often find themselves navigating adult responsibilities at an early age, a phenomenon known as parentification. While some may adapt to these roles temporarily, others face long-term emotional and […]</p>

Joy Plote
Jan 12, 20253 min read
What Australia’s Reports Reveal About Abuse in the Deaf Community
<p>Australia’s Royal Commission into Violence, Abuse, Neglect, and Exploitation of People with Disability sheds light on a deeply troubling reality: Deaf individuals face disproportionately high rates of abuse, neglect, and exploitation. This March 2021 report, prepared by the Centre of Research Excellence in Disability and Health, offers a sobering insight into the challenges Deaf individuals […]</p>

Joy Plote
Dec 3, 20245 min read
The Coda Identity: Bridging Two Worlds and Creating a Legacy
<p>The Coda identity is a complex and unique experience rooted in the intersection of Deaf and hearing worlds. Codas (Children of Deaf Adults) grow up navigating two distinct cultural and linguistic environments, often becoming language brokers/interpreters, cultural mediators, and advocates at an early age. This unique role shapes their sense of self, worldview, and interpersonal […]</p>

Joy Plote
Nov 17, 20242 min read
Brainspotting: A Powerful Therapy Option for Deaf Individuals
<p>Brainspotting, a powerful trauma therapy, has proven especially effective for Deaf individuals, offering a unique, visual, and sensory-based approach to healing. Unlike many talk therapies, Brainspotting doesn’t rely heavily on verbal processing, making it an accessible and empowering option for Deaf clients. Here’s why Brainspotting works so well for Deaf individuals and how it aligns […]</p>

Joy Plote
Nov 13, 20243 min read
Welcome to the Space Between: A Journey of Advocacy, Healing, and Education
<p>Hello and welcome to the Space Between! I’m excited to introduce myself and share a little about who I am, the work I do, and my mission to create meaningful change for Deaf individuals, Codas, and the broader community. My name is Joy Plote, and I’m a licensed counselor and a proud Coda (Child of […]</p>

Joy Plote
Oct 16, 20242 min read
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